Posts Tagged ‘kids’

As of late I have been able to dedicate myself to a lot of positive things. I became a member of my church recently and decided to dedicate my life to Christ. I am dedicated to learning about how to date, be a better person, getting out of debt and a bunch of other things. But Yesterday I was attending a good friend of mines fundraiser. I hadn’t supported her in her campaign efforts since God knows when. She has been running for city council and I have totally been MIA. Yesterday I realized how much I had been out of touch and I felt a pain in my stomach and I felt like i had failed a friend.

I always preach about friends this and that but how much of a friend have I been as of late?? Probably not a good one because just like the people i complain about I ACT LIKE just on a different level. Today I realized it and it hurt me bad but I had to own up to it so I could face it an deal with it. Just because I messed up doesn’t mean I can’t make it right, right???

So I called up my girlfriend and apologized as best I could (cuz i suck at this) and told her I would do my best to help her from this point on. She said it was ok but you know deep down actions speak louder than words. So I thought of one area I KNEW she always needed help and the only real area i knew how to help with was with the children. I told her I would come get the kids the next day and she was very grateful. See my friend always knew she needed help but she isn’t one to ask especially when it comes to her children because she feels like she shouldn’t have to “Ask” if you really cared about them that way. I can’t actually blame her to a certain extent but I know if it was me I would call err body to come watch my kids lol. Anywhoot…..

I promised myself that I would go and watch the kids a few times a week until the election is over. That is the least I can do as a friend and she is just that kind of person that would do the same for you.

So for the next 2 months this is one BIG thing I am going to dedicate myself to and ask God everyday to keep me and the kids safe cuz uh lawd knows I love the kids but ummm im no suzie home maker lol. I think it should be fun spending a lot of time with them and hopefully can learn from this experience. I want to be a person that people can depend on and I also want to follow through with things I say I am going to do. This is my second chance.



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Ok by now everybody must know that if I am not on a quest to find love I am on a quest to get money. Over the last 2 months the issues have been about relationships. I have had my run ins with the shall nots, have nots, and will nots, of the opposite sex pool but recently I encountered something that right now I can’t figure out, which is why I finally decided to post about it.

About a week or 2 ago I started praying. I asked God to send me a man, and I listed every quality known to man that I thought he should have. Now this list has been tweaked over time cuz before I was leaving ish out and well that didn’t go so well most days lol. But this list I was sure I had down packed. So a few days later I get an email and here is what it said

Wow hi you are a hard person to find!! I have been looking for you for about 3 or 4 years. I hope you rember me I worked with you a while ago. Well I am looking forward to talking to you hopefully soon!!!!”

There was a picture beside it and when I clicked on it I thought?? hmmm do I know this dude, stalker perhaps??. He didn’t say where exactly, so I attempt to remember every fine dude at work cuz u know ya girl won’t let a sexy sexy slip away so fast with passing me first lol. So I spent about 1 hour trying to recall every job in my life and it hit me like a 1 year old throwing his sippy cup going straight for my head!!!! WALLY WORLD!!! yes!!! I meet J at walmart.

J was a cool kat, rather dorky in my opinion but cool. We kicked it with each other on a regular basis for the short time I spent there but never on a serious tip. I honestly thought nothing of it back then, I was all of 22 or 23 trying to stay above water on bills. So almost 3 years later J finds me and we spent the next few days talking about whats been going on. I found myself opening up to him about everything and he was extremly calm and understanding about my situation. He also went on to inform me that all this time he has been looking for me, asking around to see if anybody knew me. Well I don’t hang in lansing so that odds of anybody knowing me would be 1 in a million. I was taken back that he was trying to find me and felt a bit flattered…………. so the story goes on.

Since that day me and J have been in communication. We had 2 rather fun dates and we talk every day now. He is the sweetest guy. On the scale of attraction he is definantly not ugly, tall (6’3) a lil skinnier than most, caramel completion, and glasses, kinda still has the dorkiness to him but nothing that can’t be worked on with a couple new outfits. He opened ALL of my car doors on the dates and footed the bills and didnt ask for ass in return lol. To me thats a BIG step from the norm lol. The other big thing about him was that he talked about the exact same financial goals and opinions as me, about being frugal, and spending less money, the man is even almost done paying off his house! I mean I really couldn’t have asked for him to sound much better than he did…… (deep sigh of relief)

So you ask why am I conflicted?? Well because sometimes tho I AM not a bible thumper. I can be extremely spiritual (got it from mom) I always analyze if something is of God or if its the devil playing tricks on my mind. I was thinking like maybe its another one of the devils tricks to get me off track, my mind went pretty crazy from there. I was able to talk to my best friend and she was very insightful, she told me only time will tell whats to come of this and she was right. So I am trying to play it cool and not get caught up in what may or may not be. Also J has 2 kids (Same mom) But I remember asking God for a man with NO kids, so why would he give me a man with 1 let alone 2??? I know there is a reason for everything and even tho no kids was on my deal breaker list, I had to remember why and that was because i had a fear that the guy wasnt taking care of them. J actually has custody of both children and the man worked his ass off to get them which says TO ME a lot about the type of guy he is (when it comes to taking responsibility for them that is). Who knows maybe I can look past the children?? I just don’t know about all this.

I do know I am over such n such from the last post!!!!! I believe God sends people in your life for a reason. So J why are you here????

On with new things!!!

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So I met this guy online a couple weeks or so ago, and last night we finally decided to meet up. I am not exactly sure what it is about me and online dating, but its been apart of my life for a good while now (actually I do know but its a longer story). As most people think its rather strange to date online, but I must save I have only had one extremly odd date which lookin back its actually funny let me tell u this story then I will share the date from last night.

Ok so I was on this site called blackpeoplemeet.com This was one site I had actually decided to pay for (10 bucks a month) The site ended up being a smörgåsbords for people with kids and i really couldn’t see paying for that. They shoulda changed it to blackpeoplewithmultiplekidsmeet.com because that was more of what it was. Anyway so i met this rather dashing man which also had a kid but It was ok. He picked me up from my house (please dont insert how dangerous this is) and we headed out to the olive garden. He wasn’t exactly my cup of tea but he was in my opinion “doable”. So anyways we get to the resturant and everything is going great, we laugh, joke, gaze into each others eyes and all that good stuff. So durring dinner he made this comment I thought was rather funny said ” u know the only reason I am on this date is so I can sleep with u” I laughed so hard wine almost came out my nose, I mean I knew he was telling the truth but still it sounded funny with him saying it like that. So I was like “yea eventually we may” U know we can pretty much tell weither we want to sleep with some one right when we meet them the “attraction meter”.

After dinner he asked what I wanted to do and I said I wasn’t ready to go home, so he suggested his place and I agreed it was fine. His home was pretty nice, it was toys everywhere from his son, which made me kinda warm n fuzzy inside. Anyways we sat n talked about kids, ex’s and all that. He told me about how he got custody of his son by deeming his baby momma crazy, which I thought was cool cuz not many men actually go through the trouble. After talking I ventured off into the living area where a collection of music was sitting, prince was on the top shelf and maxwell followed. So I flipped though the collection and we talked about our likes in music and When I moved into the kitchen I leaned up against the counter top. He put his arms around me and started kissin on me. At first it was cool then he got a lil overly aggressive so I pushed him away lil. He was like don’t u like me?? wait let me rewind to where this argressivness came from….

so yea we are sitting on the couch and I asked the stupidest question known to all men on a first date. and it was “So?? What do you think about sleeping with someone on the first date”. Now!!! I was not by any means trying to imply that I do this, but OBVIOUSLY he took this as “she wants me now” and yea that was dumb on my part but who knew??

So back to kitchen.

“yea I like u but u movin a lil to fast bruh”

so he backs off a bit and I told him it was late and I needed to go home to get my meds (I do have asthma) so my lack of breathing bailed me out that night.

So back in the car things are cool again so I felt nice enough to invite him inside again bad idea I know. anyways I turn on some slow jams and eventually we make it to my bedroom and we are laying down talking. I had informed him that nothing was going to happen but he figured otherwise since he was now layin in my bed with no shirt on but I some how still thought he was smart enough not to go there again. So we are laying and talking and I say so ” whats your idea of romance” and he goes “yep I see where this is headed” and proceeds to get up to leave.

I say umm where ya going?? He says home. I say why? and it goes down hill from here…..

He was like yea so its obvious your not going to sleep with me tonight so I should be leaving. me “blank stare” “Huh??”

let me let you in on something my dear, see im one of the good guys and its obvious that you failed to realize this so I have to go. See most women I meet I sleep with on first dates and since YOU yes YOU brought up the question about sleeping with a guy on the first date that it was on and poppin.

I said man I am soooooooooooo sorry I lead you to think that but it was just a question!!!!

“YEA but wtf would you ask a question like that??

Again my bad but I mean are u seriously mad about it?

Yea for the simple fact that women like you let wack ass men run all over you and play you and u sleep with them like its nothing but then A good guy comes along and we get no love….

But I just met u today are you kidding?

Do you know who I am? I am mutha fuckin super man!!! I am the best nigga u will ever meet in your life!! My ex was smart enough to know it so u should be too!

I am sorry boo im not your ex……

(ok this argument goes on for another hour) eventually he left, but I was in true shock, superman?? really??? I can’t believe he said that. So he dumped me because i didn’t put out on the first night. and that was by far the craziest date ever.

So back to last night. I was pretty much determined to keep our date as simple and light hearted as possible. Normally my first dates consist of talking about ex’s and bad break ups and people we hate and why we hate them. This time was different even though he tried to talk about his ex a little I quickly changed the conversation. We ended up getting fast food (Which I offered to pay for my half) He really thought that was nice of me (Since I actually pulled out the cash) but he paid for it and said thanks for the offer. We went to the bowling alley and bowled two games. It was actually pretty fun even though he beat me twice.

He brought me home and we ended with hugs. I really dunno what he thought of me but I guess I will know later.

I am trying to take a difference approach to dating overall. Not to get so caught up in who it is and just have a good time which I did. “D” says im growing up, I say its about time!


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