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Posts Tagged ‘family’

As of late I have been able to dedicate myself to a lot of positive things. I became a member of my church recently and decided to dedicate my life to Christ. I am dedicated to learning about how to date, be a better person, getting out of debt and a bunch of other things. But Yesterday I was attending a good friend of mines fundraiser. I hadn’t supported her in her campaign efforts since God knows when. She has been running for city council and I have totally been MIA. Yesterday I realized how much I had been out of touch and I felt a pain in my stomach and I felt like i had failed a friend.

I always preach about friends this and that but how much of a friend have I been as of late?? Probably not a good one because just like the people i complain about I ACT LIKE just on a different level. Today I realized it and it hurt me bad but I had to own up to it so I could face it an deal with it. Just because I messed up doesn’t mean I can’t make it right, right???

So I called up my girlfriend and apologized as best I could (cuz i suck at this) and told her I would do my best to help her from this point on. She said it was ok but you know deep down actions speak louder than words. So I thought of one area I KNEW she always needed help and the only real area i knew how to help with was with the children. I told her I would come get the kids the next day and she was very grateful. See my friend always knew she needed help but she isn’t one to ask especially when it comes to her children because she feels like she shouldn’t have to “Ask” if you really cared about them that way. I can’t actually blame her to a certain extent but I know if it was me I would call err body to come watch my kids lol. Anywhoot…..

I promised myself that I would go and watch the kids a few times a week until the election is over. That is the least I can do as a friend and she is just that kind of person that would do the same for you.

So for the next 2 months this is one BIG thing I am going to dedicate myself to and ask God everyday to keep me and the kids safe cuz uh lawd knows I love the kids but ummm im no suzie home maker lol. I think it should be fun spending a lot of time with them and hopefully can learn from this experience. I want to be a person that people can depend on and I also want to follow through with things I say I am going to do. This is my second chance.

Mikki

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Last night I was laying in bed, thinking about the day I could call the Dave Ramsey show and scream “I’m Debt Freeeeee!!”. I started to wonder what I might say to Dave when he goes through his normal questionnaire and it went something like this…..

Dave: We have Mikki from Detroit on the line “Whats up Mikki”

Me: Hi Dave how are you?

Dave: “Better Than I Deserve” “How can I help?”

Me: Well Dave I am calling to let you know I’m debt free!

Dave: Alrightttttttt!!! “How much did you pay off?”

Me: $35,000 In 18 months

Dave: Wow making what kind of money??

Me: I started out at $35k a year, I picked up a part time job and also started working my real estate business and now I am half way through the year at 55k!

Dave: Wow thats amazing, so what made you decide to get out of debt a year and a half ago?

Me: Umm well, I had just turned 25 and had just purchased a house, I was driving a 20,000 car making about 28,000 at the time. In December I got into a car accident and smashed the front end of my car, thankfully no one was hurt but, the car had no insurance on it. At the time I was driving an hour each way to work and one thing after another started to happen. I almost lost my job, and the car ended up being taken from me because I couldn’t afford the payments. I was so overwhelmed with the new house and bills that I thought about taking my life. So I was sitting at work one morning and my mom called me, she said hey they are offering FPU at a local church up here in Detroit, maybe you should check into classes in Lansing (Which is where I work). I was like ok here she goes with this Dave talk stuff again! But at that point I pretty much had nothing more to lose, I really did feel like Job in the bible and that I couldn’t lose any more than I had already. So I searched for my zip code and found a class at a church that actually started that very next day Dave.

Dave: Wow thats amazing

Me: Yea so I called the coordinator and shared my story and he said the class would be perfect for me, and since then I have never looked back.

Me: And Dave you know how you say Murphy moves in right when you start the program, well he did because about 3 months later I was forced to move out of an apartment that I was living in with a friend of mine, I had been saving for BS1 and I had to us that money to find a place. Had I not started the program I would have been a total wreck when all that happen.

Dave: Wow what an amazing story Mikki, so what would you say the hardest part of it was??

Me: I would say being made fun of but after a while It didn’t bother me anymore.

Dave: So what was the last thing you paid off.

Me: Sallie Mae

Dave: Ah good ole Sallie getting kicked out of the spare bedroom.

Me: Yup

Dave: So now that you have been through the process, what do you say the key to success is”

Me: The key is have an accountability partner and being Gazelle intense, I became friends with someone on MTMMO His name is Brad “Hi Brad” We have become really good friends and I think having someone to share that experience with you is the greatest thing, but it doesn’t work if they aren’t as Gazelle intense and Brad is the poster child for the Gazelle. Also Dave I want to thank my FPU coordinator and everybody on the Total Money Make Over forums, Those are the coolest people around!!!

Dave: Ahahaha thats awsome Mikki, so your 27 now with out a payment in the world except for the house, you are so weird now!

Me: Yep I know I feel weird!

Dave: ahaha, so what do you say to those 25-30 year olds struggling to make it?

Me: I would say they should know they are not alone and to pray as much as you can. God doesn’t put more on us than we can bear, and you have to put your trust in God 100%. The program gave me hope for my future because before I didn’t see my life being anything, but now I see a bright future and I can show others that they can do it to. Its important to have friends and family around you that love you because if it not been for my mom, and my best friend I would not be here today.

Dave: Mikki thats great advice, so you ready to count it down?

Me: Yea, 3, 2, 1 I’M DEBT FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Dave: Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa That is how its done folks!!!

(insert tears)

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Normally I don’t bring up topics about my family and friends but this seriously needs to be addressed and I needed to blog it out so I don’t end up making the same mistake. Recently I found out my aunt and her new husband of 3 months are attempting to file for a divorce. Secondly my best cousin in the whole wide world also will be separating from her husband of 3 or 4 months give or take as well. Now either there is something in the water or food that is causing families to fall apart and I for one can’t stand for it. Before I say why tho let me tell you about the two situations.

First my Aunt

It all started back in 97. My aunt was introduced to this dude through a family member of ours and the rest was history. Now let me start by saying I was young back then but I wasn’t dumb enough to not see that they relationship was a bit misguided at times. Now fast forward 11 years later and I child They married a few months ago and now want a divorce. Why you ask??? Because of money that’s why. Nobody wants to pay for the house that was just built 1.5 years ago from the ground. Nobody wants to keep the lights on and make sure the family is fed. Now news flash yall been together 11 years and suddenly decided yall had money issues?? This is a couple that makes well over $100,000 which is good for couples in Michigan, and they have the potential to be very wealthy. But they fight constantly about who is going to pay what. Seriously grow the hell up!!! (Sorry auntie) but this is ridiculous for yall to be fighting at yall age. Its affecting the children and if you woke up and decided you wanted to act like a 2 year old and not a 40 year old then maybe you should not have had children.

Now my Cousin

My dear wonderful, loving, hard working cousin. Just found a bunch of pills out on the floor left for her one year old child to consume and end up with serious damage and possible death. What the hell you say?? Yes baby daddy/hubby of a few months is a druggie (why I dunno) But this nigga was always a damn druggie!! Cousin don’t tell me he woke up one day out the blue after 2 kids and decided he wanted to deal crack and smoke it too. I don’t by it not for one moment. You knew he had a drug problem but you still decided to be with him and now you want out. Hell I don’t blame you for wanting out but still this should have never happen to begin with.

I am saying to all women out there that allow shit like this to happen stop it!! I get sick of people sugar coating there lives only to find out years later nothing about the situation was a bed of roses. Who are you trying to impress by acting this way? In the end your only hurting yourself. I know there is a lot of pressure out there to live a Godly life and not be in sin by shacking up but if the situation is rotten, you taking vows to each other is not going to be a magic resolve for all the issues you both have faced for several years. Let me tell you what 3 things don’t make good logic for marrying a person. 1 longevity, just because you been with them for ages doesn’t mean its love, time is no band aid. 2 kids, I know we like to keep families together but they suffer from watching you tear each other down on a regular basis, children aren’t stupid. 3 bills, I for one had a mother who did not count on a man to support her and her family, she worked 2 and 3 jobs if she had to in order to keep food on the table. If my mom can do it so can you.

I thank God I have friends who occasionally slap sense into me when I am doing something stupid in a relationship and it has helped me not end up in bad situations, so to my girlfriends and family doing dumb ish this is my slap in the face to you. STOP THAT SHIT!!!

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My best friend is on her way to chicago to see her cousin who is in the hospital. She is the same age as us (mid 20’s) and Is on life support due to breast cancer that has spread to her liver. The last two weeks have been rather instrumental in heightening my cancer awareness. While I thank God non of my imediate family has ever had to deal with cancer some of the people I consider very close to me have. Its a disheartening thing when a woman has to lose her breast to save her life. I just want to ask everyone to take time to do some research on the issue and also if you haven’t gotten your check ups to do that as well. Also to pray for my friends and her family she has a 2 year old little girl.

MIKKI

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It was 2:43pm, I was sitting at my lil desk at work typing up some labels for some stuff I had to mail out. The cell phone rings in a message alert and who is it, my little loving brother James. Now if yall dunno about James, he is my favorite (and only) lil brother, who is in Alabama attending his first year in college at Tuskegee University. His message reads “hey lil how are you? You don’t suppose you could send some spare change for your loving but struggling brother” Now if yall know me, I am the type to bitch and pitch a fit when it comes to dealing with James cuz sometimes we aren’t exactly treated fairly by mommy, but I love him to death and I do anything for him always when he ask. So I let him know I would put some funds in his account when I got of work and he happily replied “thank you so much”  

Now as I resume my work load I get to thinking to myself, where the FUCK is his father??? Now my mom is working her ass off having not even enough food to feed herself trying to pay for his college. The boy is holding down a 3.0 his first year and he is in the engineering program and he aint taking kiddy classes either. So I commend my mom for doing all she can to keep his butt in school. But his daddy is MIA. Now this man is not the typical dead beat no having job 10 kids man. He has worked a good job ever since I known him, separated from my mom (we have diff dads) then went to marry another woman and have 1 other child. Currently this nigga is living now in a big house drives 2 cars and affords to put his one lil munchkin in a private school somewhere to the tune of 3,000 a semester and she only in 1st grade, but has yet to send my brother a dime. WTF is wrong with this picture???? I am angry on a whole nother level, because here you have a young man that has stayed out of trouble for his 18 years, went on to make something of himself without the help of his dad and he cant even ask you for a couple bucks for food for his dorm room??. He could be a drug dealer, gang banging, pants sagging weed smoking kid in the streets. But he is not. The boy goes to church even!!! What father in his right mind wouldn’t support his only son that’s doing so well? I just don’t get it. I know hate is a strong word but I’m tempted to use it. This man will and has shown up for all of my brothers sporting events acting like he somebody to other folks, thinking he actually participates in my brother’s life. I swear if I see him at my brother’s graduation I’m going to go off on him and try not to kill him because I seriously am sick and tired of this shit. 

 So to all yall dead beat fathers and yall know what dead beat means, don’t ever say a word to me about kickin it or hanging or anything of the sort, matter fact don’t even look my way if your not taking care of your kids ALL of them. Because I am utterly disgusted with you !!!!

 

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