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Archive for March, 2009

It was 9:30pm and I was on the phone ranting about how upset I was that the location for the ANTM auditions hadn’t been posted, being that the auditions was the next day. I had given up for the most part but something in my brain told me to check one last time. I did check and wouldn’t you know the location was staring me square in the eye. I immediately panicked for about 5 minutes and calmed down enough to hear the voice of my girlfriend telling me to go. So there I was at 10pm trucking down the I94FWY to get to Chicago.

I arrived at about 12:30pm and checked into the Red Roof inn. The receptionist was very pleasant and did her best to make sure I had everything I needed. When I told her about the auditions she began sharing a story about a 18 year old guy that had previously stayed at the hotel also trying out for a show. The show was called Sundays best and is hosted by Kirk Franklin on BET. She told me about how the guy needed to use the printer and she said he would have to sing for her and 5 more people that came into the hotel. She said his voice was like an angel and soon after he began singing he started drawing a crowd. The 18 year old did actually make the show and called her to say how grateful he was for helping him out. Even though I couldn’t sing, rap or dance, the woman was so kind to me.

So fast forward to the auditions there was a LOT of girls. So I get inline outside and started chatting it up with the girl in front of me. We ended up being inseparable for the duration of the auditions. Neither of us made the cut, but I would have to say it was all worth it to have made new friends in the process. The auditions were actually rather brutal. Having stood in line for some 4 hours only to get to the end and be cut in 2 seconds and all you said was your name, weight, and age???

Another girl I met actually made it to the second round, she was also cut 2 minutes after being chosen to move on. One lesson I learned about auditioning for the show was to always be prepared. You would think that should have been a given but lil Mik was under the impression that the judges wanted everyone to be plain. It was actually the total opposite, they wanted you to stand out among a group of 100 girls in the room. I can’t say I actually did that so lesson learned.

If I had to do it again I would, the experience was great and this is just one more thing I can add to my history book. I am grateful for having the courage to even audition because some people don’t even thing they have what it takes. I learned to never say what isn’t possible and always think of ways to make things happen because if you try hard enough eventually they will.

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Last night I had another one of the weirdest of dreams. I been having them more often since I been off my fast and eating all sorts of things not even half way on the vegan list. I was dreaming last night that I was in some other city (maybe state). I was dressed kinda crazy, shoes untied clothes not matching ect…actually thats how I usually dress but anyways. I was in a mall, a seemingly super nice mall. It had stores I hadn’t even heard of but from the looks of the place I was in some big city. So im walking down the hallway and here come my two co-workers. Theses aren’t just any co-workers though, these are the two women out of all women that I can’t stand. One is the icky nasty lady who wears shorts to work every day as if its bedtime, and she coughs a lot and puts her nasty fingers in food she shouldn’t touch so no one else will want it. The other lady always tries to get me in trouble ever since I didn’t give her a ride home like I said I would (she hadn’t forgiven me for that). Ok so here they are dressed like its work time and they see me. “What are you doing here Mikki?” “I am sick what does it look like?” Oh you are playing hookie today heh heh heh. “No im sick, does it look as though im having fun?”.”Why are YOU here”. “Well we have the day off so we are hanging out”

So the conversation ends and we part ways. Later on I see them entering what looks to be a lavish restaurant, and my one co-worker (the non icky one) has on this beautiful black dress and her hair is pint up. She looks to die for and I had never seen her so pretty nor had I ever seen her in a dress. Anyways the rest of the day I SPENT not shopping and wondering if they might tell my boss and how I was going to cover up where I was.

The dream was rather odd but I think it had something to do with my plans to go to chicago tomorrow and not tell anyone. I must say I am sort of happy that at least I know some parts of that story wouldn’t come to life because I’m not going. There has been no updates on the location of the chicago auditions for americas next top model and apparently the buzz on the street is that it already happen March 19th at some undisclosed location.

So there goes my dreams……………

(tears)

Ok im a little upset and hurt but not that hurt, I will survive!!!

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kimora_hed_340

I have pretty much been a fan of Kimora Lee Simons ever since I saw her with Russel years ago on MTV cribs. I like her style and most of all her divaesq attitude. Some times (Read a lot) she can be a true bitch, I remember one episode where she had James running around checking the weather every 2 seconds to see if it would rain or not because if it did she wouldn’t do her photo shoot. Funny thing is she had no real intent not to do the shoot, she just wanted to as she said “keep James on his toes” But this post isn’t about Kimora actually its just about my weekend and how I just like saying fabulous a lot!!

Friday night I had my interview with a real estate company a co-worker of mine hooked me up with. I actually did get the job so lets pray it all goes well!!

After that I was called last minute to go see Lion King the musical. It was a wonderful show and I would see it 5 more times (during the day). I was so tired!!

Saturday morning I picked up the kids and we went to fenner park for the maple syrup festival. We learned about all kinds of birds, touched a snake, got our faces pained and had maple syrup sundays! After that we had pizza and watched movies. Incase some of you don’t know baby sitting every know and again is my form of birth control, trust it works!

Saturday evening my boo came, we made dinner (he did) and we watched the game.

Sunday we went out for lunch and spent the afternoon at his aunts house. We ended up watching Cadillac records and soul men, two good movie by the way.

It was a very fun weekend and it was very nice to spend time with all the folks I love!

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Its been about a month now since my best friend started dating this guy that she dated back in high school. As I may have mentioned before the man had recently separated from his wife of 12 years and are currently starting legal proceedings for a divorce. As of late she has been extremely gitty and I must say it has been bugging the crap out of me. At first I tried to cover up the fact that I wasn’t jealous because the situation in my opinion is rather odd but non the less I was still jealous and I didn’t want to face that fact.

But why? don’t you have a man? Yup I sho do, and he is just the sweetest and almost perfectess man I have ever dated. But I noticed in talking to her that we don’t have that “Thing” you know when you can’t stop talking about them, you act amazingly strange/silly when they come around and you are always laughing and seemingly having a good time. As of late me and S has just been going through the motions. I had been overly stressed from work, my empty unrented house in detroit, and my crazy roommates from h e double hockey sticks. My relationship has really been the last thing on my mind, even tho s had been with me for the last two weeks my mind was else where.

Since I owned up to my jealously I have felt a sense of calmness because sometimes its ok to feel that way but it isn’t something that should consume me. I don’t actually want to be in my best friends shoes (Ever) but I do want to get back to that happy place where all was good with the world.

I ended up telling s about the said issue and amazingly he “felt” that same thing I was feeling. As perfect as we may be together, it doesn’t always mean we are right for eachother, and it seems as though both of us are willing to except it if it may be the case. So we both committed to eachother to give eachother 100% of ourselves and allow for us to fall in love and if it fails we figure we did at least try. I know there are a lot of pixie dust relationships out there and I certainly don’t want mine to be one of them. My relationship has proven so far that we can communicate, trust, and give to eachother which are really important things that keep a relationship together. But those aren’t the only things that keep it.

So in the end I learned that before I worry about how green someones grass is I need to worry about how I am taking care of my own grass and that is the good truth!!

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I have been a fan of Americas Next Top Model ever since the day it aired. I caught the modeling bug back when I was about 24 years of age. I did a couple photo shoots, because you know what they say “always gotta have head shots“. I even signed up for a modeling agency that ended up going bankrupt shortly after I signed. But most of all modeling was more of an idea in my head than anything. I for one didn’t have the know how, and secondly I was 120 lbs standing tall at 5’3. Sure I knew all about “industry standards” and how many “petite” women model but I didn’t ever think I would be that “Exception” to the ten feet tall and skinny as a twig rule.

When ANTM aired I immediately looked up the “height” requirements only to discover that you had to be at least 5’7 to even try out. So my dream to be on the show ever in life would be just that, a dream.

Until NOW that is!! As every one may know they recently announced that ANTM cycle 13 will be just for the “short girls” When I first saw that announcement I darn near fell off the bed because this was my time. I never thought it would happen but apparently they are gonna give us shorter girls a chance and guess who is gonna try out (yes me!!). ANTM will be holding auditions through March and the will be holding one open casting call in Chicago and I will be in attendance. I have exactly 9 days to eat nothing prepare and I am going to be working my but off doing a Daniels fast rewind for the next week. Even though I am extremely nervous I feel like this is something I have to do, one of those you don’t know until you try and I am a big fan of trying. So all of you out in blogger world better get my autograph now because I am gonna be AMERICAS NEXT TOP MODEL!!!

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As everyone may know today was my last day of the Daniels fast. It ended at 12 noon and I had been planning on what I might eat for lunch for the whole morning and trust me burgers was on the brain. But during the course of the day I fell into a hell of a funk. I am suppose to be happy today, I lost weight, I FINISHED something, and I am moving on to do something greater because of this 21 day experience.

So why am I all down and out?? After thinking about it I realized its because its much easier to be mad about something than to think about ways to make something better. Typically I like to feel sorry for myself and be in a bad mood because for some odd reason it makes me feel better to crawl under a rock and not deal with things. Well I can’t keep putting things off, thats only going to create a bigger mess. So This afternoon I spent the day doing things that I knew would put me back into a positive mood and it worked and I am soo glad.

The other thing I noticed is that I didn’t look for food to comfort my annoyance with the day, even though I could have eaten anything I wanted I didn’t, I had my usual snacks just as if I was still on the fast. This made me realize how much of an affect it had on my behavioral pattern. Everybody has stress every now and then but what I am realizing is that just because it takes a bit more energy to think positively than to sulk doesn’t mean its ok to do.

So if your in a bad mood get up n go do those things that highlight how much of a beautiful person you are, and how proud you should be off all your accomplishments its working for me and it should work for you too!!

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So Its 2 days away from my fast officially being over, and though its been hard its been worth it. Missing cookies, candies, sugar, and not to mention my favorite cereal in the whole world. Even after 19 days I think its safe to say I can do without some things. The most important lesson I have learned in all this is support, I needed a lot of it through the fast in order to say on track.

Over the weekend I went work out equipment crazy. I brought bender ball, two 5lbs weights, a jump rope and a work out mat. The bender ball is rather interesting to say the least. Its way better than doing regular crunches and its doesn’t kill ya after the work out is over. I am going to finish out the week with working out every day, tryin to prepare myself for the big day is no jokey joke!

I also brought a blender and lots of fruits n veggies, im guessing if i make mixed drinks it will be easier to get more of the fruits down.

I hope everyone had a super fun weekend.

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